You could say we experienced the antithesis of Black Friday the day after Thanksgiving.Instead of mauling other shoppers for a discounted Christmas sweater, we spent three quiet hours at a local wat and emerged with the equivalent of five shopping bags less of unnecessary mental, emotional and spiritual garbage than the worthless material goods we would have taken home had we been out at the sales.

Some of the wisdom that resonated with me the most and that I’ll do my best to remember during the hectic holiday month ahead:

• You’re not good, you’re not bad, you just are.
• You are not defined by your job, your roles (wife, mother, daughter), your looks or your possessions.
• Respect your children. You must take care of them until they can care for themselves, but you do not own them.
• Let go of everything and the concept of “mine.” You do not own anything.
• Don’t let anything - or anyone - own you.

Obviously, I’m not against or above shopping or living a life of acquisition (as opposed to one of renunciation). Hardly. But spending the day after Thanksgiving in quiet contemplation of our lives as individuals and as a family undoubtedly made us tenfold richer than any bargain basement deal ever could have.

So, today - Cyber Monday, instead of my usual frenetic online shopping behavior, I’m opting to spend those precious minutes I would otherwise be wasting in the black hole of the Internet seeking useless paraphernalia for our already materially-bloated lives with my family. We’re spending our time - instead of our money - in the here and now in the luxury of each other’s company and the excess of our love, repairing - not incurring - debt of the spiritual - not financial - kind.

Besides, any shopper worth her salt knows that the best sales are the unadvertised ones after Christmas.

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